On Starlight

[So it rained a li'l]

I will not promise you,
The things I usually do,
Wonderful, beautiful, delightful little things,
Beads of pearls and emerald rings,
Nor enchanting moments, sublime dreams.
Instead I’ll be just me and you will be you,
I will, for once, keep it true.

The night is kind – its been raining.
Clock’s ticking – hour hand’s gaining
What is distance measured in miles?
But worthless data scribbled in files?
Skin on skin - still light years apart.
Pick a star my darling and give it my name.
Its yours forever – your own precious gem.

I’ll cross the seven seas, on starlight.
I shall go to thee, every night.
I’ll be one in the happy crowd – being fun and more,
I’ll be watching your feet, as they dance across the floor.
We’d smile and greet, when we meet at the door.
Some nights we’d be standing, on top of the old stairs,
And watch the skies above – layers upon layers.

Meet the pig

Heres something bout myself. I'm a pig and a happy one at that. Want proof? See below:

 

 

 

 

 

Heres another one.

Beware of labels

This is very weird. I am the type of person who is quick to label people, incidents or any other shit that comes my way. Still I hate labels more than I ought to. I think labels are misleading, deceiving and conceited. I see people running after labels all the time (including me), wearing the right cloths, assuming the right attitude and all. They work so hard on the label that they don’t have time to spend time on what the label was about. For example, lets consider poets, stereo types. They will almost always wear long hair, say stuff that may or may not have meanings, will have a weird look on their faces that’s neither here not there. Well, I guess I shouldn’t complain. They also write stuff from time to time.

Sometimes we use animals as labels. For instance, a lying, deceiving boy friend is often called a fox. Bad people are called wolves. Evil is labeled with bats. If u think about it, all those animals are quite nice. Cute too I must say. Just download pictures and see for yourself.

I think I am talking crap. Signing off.

At Mid Day

At mid day the weary traveler stood on the sandy beach of Equator.
He felt tired and dehydrated from his long journey under the sun.
Presently he found his way blocked by the enormous mount Decision;
Its steep granite walls offered no entrance.

On the left lay the vast sea of Illuminati,
Its blue surface glittered under the noon sun.
The foamy waves carried a message in a bottle –
“Ardent seeker, come to me.
I shall carry you far and away.
My waves will wash the dirt off of your tired body
The sea wind will purify your heart and
The brine shall heal all wound.
If you come, I will reveal to you
The mysteries of my depths.
If you be strong come!
Ride my waves.”

The vast expanse of the sea amazed the traveler.
He wondered with awe about the secrets it hides.
But the turbulent waves frightened him.
He had not the strength to go with tides.

Then he looked onto the right.
Where the woods of Life lay green and alluring.
“Come to me tired traveler.”
My trees will shelter you from the scorching sun
And bear you fruits.
I shall give to you the sweetest nectar and honey
For your thirst.
In me you will never be lonely.
Here you shall hunt and be hunted,
You shall serve and be served.
If you can live as one, come.”
The woods thus spoke.

The offerings of Life excited the tired traveler.
He marveled at the flora and fauna,
The chirping of birds and smell of wild flowers.
But he had not the heart to live as one.

Finally, from a shadowy corner of the woods,
Called out the quicksand of Truth.
“Traveler, you must come to me.
I know you. I have what you seek.
It is I and only I who have answers.
It is from me, that you came to be,
And to me you must return.
You have neither the courage to conquer the seas of mystery,
Nor the mind to be one in the circle of Life.
Still my child you have traveled far and have endured.
And now I shall keep you waiting no longer
Come now and I’ll reveal all.”

Trembling and shaking the traveler stepped in
He was aware of the consequences
But he knew now that there never were choices
For him and the likes of him.

When the sand came up to his waist he felt comfort;
His travel weary feet hart no more.
When the sand came up to his chest he felt healed;
The sore heart bled no more.
As the black sand oozed into his nostrils and
made way into his brain he felt felt suffocated.
But he knew it was not in vain.
Finally, submerged in the dark,
There were no more noises, no more pain.
And in the silence the truth was spoken in an audible whisper.
“Sleep now my son, this is it.”
And there were no more secrets.

Droplets in the Sea

Instead of fretting over how dull things are going, and planning on skipping a trip to do something ‘interesting’ back home, it is better to go on that trip. At least the ‘interesting’ thing to do doesn’t turn out to be wondering what might have been. Long story short, I am glad I went to the Sundarbans with the office folks. It was a very good trip. Good company, good food, good view all around.
And no! We did not see any tigers, that is, except for the ones on coffee mugs, posters and the documentary footage they showed last night. Frankly, I think it is better to be disappointed than meeting one of those cats face to face, who happen to have a nasty reputation for eating people. I am happy to be writing this blog today instead of turning into dried kitty liter in some desolate corner of the forest where nobody uses a laptop.

In the morning we took the boat to explore the canals, went hiking along the shore and through the jungle and jumped like babies each time we saw a deer, a fish or a bird. Believe me, they were well worth the occasional bee stings and fly bites. The beach was excellent; by far the most fun one I have ever splashed in. I thoroughly enjoyed the afternoon siestas on top deck; you’d love the wind up there.

 

 

 

 

After the sun went down we’d help ourselves to chilled beers and late at night, something stronger. The addafying went on till very late at night and everybody went to bed happy. On the last night we were a bit worried as we had almost run out of supplies but the last bottle turned out to be a god sent. We had the most amazing conversations on life, happiness, world politics, religion and what not! You know how these go; we’d go on arguing, agreeing, starting and abandoning threads and joking about the gravest of issues. The next morning I woke up with the sweetest hangover in my life and I enjoyed it with Jim Morrison, gazing at the soothing green on either side of the boat.

I was undoubtedly the happiest man that morning until I wanted to have a look at the poem I had written the second night on the boat.
Although I never got to read it a second time I was very much in love with it. It was one of those that come from the heart in the spur of the moment and you love it even if it is no good. It was one of those moments when it is not you looking for the words but rather words come looking for you and they came flowing as soon as you take a pen to the paper. I wrote it during ‘happy hours’ at night so I am sure many of the lines would have been very hard to decipher. But I loved it still and when I found that it was lost, it hit me hard. Never in my life have I felt that way about a poem, any poem at that. The anguish I felt, can only be compared with the anguish of heartbreak. Oh well, am over it now. For the record, the title was ‘Droplets in the Sea’.

Season's Beginning

Guys, check this out: http://khsh.blogspot.com/2006/03/seasons-beginning_21.html This kid is great or what? :D

Its not to be found

It is not to be found in ‘Solitude’

Carefully planned and neatly arranged.
You can try it you have the time,
And move the furniture around,
Will be good exercise and lots of sound.

You just wont hear the music in your soul.

It is not to be found in ‘Sacrifice’.

Carefully calculated and well advertised.
You can try it nine to five,
You will be crunching numbers,
Or punching posters and flyers,

Wont have time for the poetry in your heart.

It will not be found in ‘The Dark’.

Carefully sealing the windows or painting them black.
A plastic man in synthetic dark;
The blackness will say nothing to you.
They wont work - the fragrant candles that you light.

You won’t ever meet the shadows of the night.

It will not be found in ‘There’

It is not in crystal balls,
Nor in shopping malls.
It is not in special classes,
Nor in wine glasses.

You can’t find it there; not like ‘That’.

Show and tell

Think the blog is pretty dry with too many words and not enough pictures. I am beginning to think blogging is not the thing for a lazy person like me. 1st it was just writing stuff. Then it was trying to get the spellings right and now pictures! You think its ez to deal with pictures? Not for a lazy bum like me. Here is why:

1. 1st you have to take the pictures.
2. Then you have to hook the cam up to your PC and dload them.
3. Then you got to look at them.
4. Then you got to look at them again and figure which one to put in your blog.
5. Then writing all that crap again for no reason.
6. Uploading the pictures. Tilting them and moving them from right to left and stuff.

Oh well...here are some from my last trip.

 

 

 

 

Gangtok City. Not impressed? Move on the next one.

 

 

 

 

Pictures dont do justice

 

 

 

 

Lazy Afternoon

 

 

 

 

 

 

The tourist

 

 

 

 

YAK! YAK!! YAK!!!

 

 

 

 

A walk to remember

 

 

 

 

 

 

The road back?

smenita

Thats what the stupid word that is showing in the word verification for commenting. I was trying to respond to comments on the last post and the stupid blog wont let me write anything on my own blog! Now this is the kind of thing that makes people see shrinks for anger management issues.

Anyway...might as well post the comment in here.

Nowal, I kinda wait months b4 theres a new one. I wish you wdnt say that though. Was kinda hoping to see some in your blog.

I went to GLab. Its a bangla med and u'd probably not know it. Graduated from a private uni here.

Shaki, stick to yours. They are way better than mine. :P

Ray of light

Ok, now after thinking about it for years, doing extensive research on the human psyche, and listening to all those things told everywhere and reading stuff here and there, I can finally say that I know ‘shit about shit’. Gosh! This terribly stupid, extremely vain and utterly nonsense phrase is becoming such a cliché with me! Oh well screw the dramatics. The thing I wanted to say is that I just found out that there is truth to what the wise folks say to us.

“Life don’t have to have a meaning”
“No use in planning things.”
“Don’t bet too much on having things figured out. At the end of the day, no matter how bad or good things might be looking and how much time you spent speculating, things can easily go the other way and for no good reason. A small thing can cast a shadow that’ll linger on for years or it may light up your whole week. You just don’t know. So don’t worry about stuff and do what you have to do and keep your figures crossed.“

Well…I guess the wise men and women of the world already know these simple things. But we, the common folks always feel a li’l ecstatic when we figure one or two of these ourselves and go rambling on forever. Better not do that. I’d like to vouch for just one more thing wise folks say before I sign off. That is you should never under estimate the power of a friendly smile, a hearty handshake or a kind word. They do make a world of difference.

Pictures in ma head

[Still bumming at work. Feels like math class all over again. Not doing what I'm supposed to and writing crap on the notebook.]

You shoulda seen the pictures in ma head!
You’d love ‘em for sure – love ‘em bad.
You’d love the scenes and back drops
Real neat and sophisticated.
You’d love the people in there
And all the stories they share
And the way we all walk and talk
And drink and dance
Then surrender to the night
Give in to the trance,
All in a this crazy, beautiful world,
Where everything makes sense,
No malice, no lies,
No acting up, no pretence,
It’d blow your mind.
And you’d never look behind.

Oh well…they stay in ma head.
Can show you none – none at all;
Cant put ‘em down on paper,
Cant draw ‘em on the wall.
But trust me on this
Some of ‘em are real good.

Comments please

People have been complaining that leaving comments on my blog is very difficult. Ok...so I changed it to allow everyone to leave comments on it. So, there goes your excuse people! Dont be lazy. Sit up and type some comments in already!

Faulty Props

(found this lying around the room. One of the time killers from math classes I think.)

A spell is cast in the air
What was the magic?
The book tells the story
Of another time; in another place
Of feverish lovers
In state of grace.
Or was it the smell of your sweat?
When your body refuses to wait…

The show ends,
Curtain drops
The magician complains
- Faulty props

Somebody calls; she wishes you well.
A friendly gesture! Isn’t that swell!
“Wasn’t much of anything.” – you say.
And your friend agrees.
“Good thing to cut it short.”
“Yea. This just wasn’t his day.”

Shit Story

The three of them came out of the gate and ran down to the street laughing and pushing each other. Three cousins: lets call them 1st, 2nd and 3rd.
"You are damned lucky we dint stay in longer. We woulda drained you dry tonight." - says 3rd.
"What the hell are you talking about? You din't win. You just didn't loose this time." – 2nd disagrees; he was in the other team.
"Yep! And thats how it starts. Its a whole new game bird brain. Get used to it."
"Its a good thing we dint stay in there longer. There’s something wrong with the damned room. Cant seem to breathe right in there" – 1st speaks.
"Yeah! And its too fucking hot in there too!"
"I liked the old room better"
"Way better!"

"Say! Gotta hand it to you guys. You have gotten better at this." – 2nd starts again.
"huh?" – 1st stops and looks at 2nd.
"No I mean you play a lot better now. Make less mistakes. Not so much that we do."
"Is he trying to be funny?" – 1st looks at 3rd.
"He is trying to be funny."
"Is he funny? I dont think he is funny."
"Hey. Honest! I am not trying to pull anything...you know...you guys are better ...and we have to take you seriously and all."
"You wanna show him how funny we are?"
"Lets do it."

2nd got wind and ran for it. 1st sprints behind him and catches him in 5 seconds.
"Gotcha asshole! I got something for you" -1st jabbed his fist on 2nd's back.
"Hey bro! I said I'm sorry! Lemme go."
"Yo! You want to do a joke on him too?" - 1st yelled at 3rd who by this time has lost interest in the race and is walking towards the cigarette stand.
"Hey I'm talking to you. You wanna play with the joker? What the hell! I go all this trouble to catch him and now he wont do anything! Oh well.." 1st lets go of 2nd’s arm.
"You got a buck on you?" 3rd asks 2nd.
"All I got is 75c."
"I got 75 too! that makes it 1.5!"
"You took that from me the other day"
"Yeah...where else would I get 75c"
"How come you walk around with 75c? Where do you get 75c anyway?"
"Well...no...I dont...u know..."
"Hell no! What do you do with 25s? Where are these coming from?"
"Well...the tea stall guy game me 8 of them the other day. I dunno what he does with those"
"Well so he game you 8 of those. But how come you always have one on you paired with a 50?"
"Fuck you! I have 'em for your shit!" - 2nd got impatient.
"Hahaha...this is nice. Why does he say he has 'em?" - 1st was enjoying the conversation.
"He says he has them for my shit." - 3rd replies.
"For you shit? Why is that? Whats your shit got to do with 75c?"
"I dunno. Ask him."
"Whats his shit got to do with your 75c?" - 1st asks 2nd.
2nd says nothing.
"May be he loves the way my shit stinks. But he never bought 'em from me though."
2nd shakes his head and walks away.

They came up to the bridge. They walked passed a tall man with long hair. The man is clad in rags and has a mad look in his eyes. Probably belongs to one of those cults that hang around tombs and incineration grounds. 1st thought about the time his mother told him not to go near these people cause they know hypnotism and steal young children. "Wonder if they really know something. They know something for sure. But how much of it really work? Well...there is a world for everything they say - everything in its place. May be what they know do work in theirs. They wont work in mine I guess, unless I want them to. My world. What world is that? If I am so in love with it why am in such a hurry to leave it? Oh fuck it! I got way too much time for bullshit." - 1st thought as he carefully avoided stepping on the bodies covered in rags lying on the bridge. "Wonder why they come here to sleep. May be its breezy up here".

"I think I'm coming down with a fever. Dont like being sick." - 3rd said unhappily.
"I dont feel very well myself. Musta been the stupid room." said 1st.
"Naah. I had this since morning."
"Oh well...hey! That looks nice!" - 1st turned back to look at the girl at the foot of the bridge. She pretended to be totally unaware of the attention given her and tried to look busy with her cell phone. But she got caught trying to steal a glance at 2nd.
"Hahaha! They could never resist him!"
"That was a nice kitten."
"And a mighty odd one too. Some thing fishy going on in there!"
"Huh? What do you mean not right? You are trying to say she's a whore? Come on lad! Her mother and brother was there too!"
"What are you talking about? She was alone."
"Like hell she was! Was so into the nasty world in your head you missed her whole family standing a few feet away trying to get a cab. You sick fuck! Why would you say a thing like that about a nice decent girl?"
"Come now! How do you know she is a decent girl?" - 3rd protested.
"Just shut the fuck up you jerk!" - 1st looked mad.
3rd shut up.

"Now thats a pretty moon!" - 1st looked at the sky through the branches of the trees.
"A beautiful piece of the sky, the most incredible moon - done that. The poor folks on the street - done that too. Hell! I've been walking these streets for too long."
1st flicked the smoke off towards a tree. The burning tip broke into splinters as it hit the trunk. 1st looked pleased.
"Why do you think that cop is there?" - 2nd pointed towards a patrolman.
"I have a feeling you are gonna tell us."
"I think he is there to catch people carrying booze."
"Huh? What makes you think so?"
"You know...the bar is close."
"Close? Its on the other side of the highway 4 blocks away. Dont you think people might want to take other roads closer from it? Lets say...if they are not too drunk? The cop isn’t drunk. Is he? Still he is so smart that he chooses to guard a road four blocks away? Not the one on right, not the one in left or the one right on the other side of the highway? He's there to catch drunk folks who are so wasted that they wont take any of those roads and walk all the way down 3 blocks...and then cross the highway and not get run over and then walk another 2 blocks, carrying booze, all to walk right into his trap? You are a fucking genius!"
"Cops are suckers for money you know." - 2nd said gravely.
"Yeah! And you are a freaking moron! Shut the fuck up!!"

Paranoia

I have a gift
Unlike many unfortunate souls
I can turn it off
To be better off
When the load gets too heavy
I can just put it down and turn away
I tell myself I'd get back
But there'll never be the day.

Why does it pain me so?
Why does it have to do be so difficult?
To hold on to it - to serve it.
Why does it make you bleed?
When it knows that you arent up for it?
It should choose someone else.
Someone stronger; someone who is nothing like me
And leave me be.

Alien Rain

(First night at Gangtok)

Alien Rain

This alien rain
    Doesn't do a thing for me,

This remarkably expensive,
Carefully orchestrated,
Obligatory charade,
    Is as cold as it could be.

The sound of it falling,
The unfamiliar smell of it
Its convenient timing
    Only irritates me

It gets you soaked but keeps you dry.
It lets you touch but never gets you high.
It charges you by the minute
But doesn’t get you through the night.
It can’t sooth; can only bite.

This whore of an alien rain,
    Is NOT for me.

Tin Can Again!

Good thing that’s settled.
Lets kick it outta sight.
So long No Good Tin Can
Scram! You heard us right!

Now lets look at something else.
Something not so commonplace.
Lets have it on the table
Before they show it on the cable.
Let us turn it upside down.
Let us wear it like a crown.

Got a good thing here all right!
No wonder its sealed on tight!
Now lets find out whats within…
What? A STUPID CAN OF TIN!

I am keeping these

Things that we’re all born with,
Things that I’ve lost,
Things that I have traded in,
No matter what they’d cost,
Things that I could do without
But happy that I’ve got,
Things that stay out of reach
That labels me ‘have not’,

- I give up all of it.
And renounce all credit.

But I’m keeping these
Which you will never miss.

I wish I were a painter

I wish I were a painter
And a good one at that.
I’d paint these shabby walls,
The ugly doors, boring ceiling, the whole house.

And when I’m done I’d go out side
And paint the world!

Looking at tin cans

Looking at tin cans, looking on hard
From one of these angles it’ll look like a bird,
Or a bear, or a deer, or may be a penguin!
May be they are all true – all quite genuine!

Or so they say – the ones who know
What to call stuff – coke, smack, blow.

But guess what lad,
And this is rather sad.
Sometimes a tin can is
Just a tin can and not
Superman.